The Sunday Sound: 2-for-1 Special! Testimony! Profanity!

Isaac. New scriptures. "Choose the Right" tie.

What could possibly be better than a free nugget of sound? TWO free nuggets of sound! And today is your lucky day! Please try to contain your excitement.

No, really. Reel that in.

For any dedicated fans who have noticed my two Sunday hiatus, I can assure you it has been with good cause. And today's 2-for-1 special explains everything.

I was in Dallas the first weekend of December, attending the baptism of my rad nephew Isaac. He was baptized on Saturday, and the next day I went to church with this newly minted little dude and his family. It was Fast Sunday. That means we Mormon types go without meals for the day and give the money we would have spent on food to charity. Our meeting that day consists of the testimonies of whoever in the audience feels so compelled to go up to the podium and speak off the cuff. It is a good time.

Isaac had never done this before, and my brother and sister-in-law have never talked to him about it. A few people got up and after a bit of listening, Isaac leans over to my brother Derek and asks him if he can go up. Derek ekes out a hesitant "yes." Kelly realizes what is happening and gets a terrified look on her face as Isaac makes his move. And as any good aunt would, I press "RECORD."

My favorite part: after the last word you hear, he just shrugged his shoulders and sauntered off.

THE SUNDAY SOUND: December 18, Isaac's first testimony.
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Front row means you can't screw up.

The second weekend of December was filled with roughly twelve hours of singing. TWELVE. HOURS. OF. SINGING. I participated in the 11th annual Christmas concert put on by the women of my church. Freak. These girls don't mess around! There had been epic rehearsals for weeks.

I auditioned for a solo (please remind me of this if I try to do that again next year) and was assigned a soprano piece in a "negro spiritual".

It turns out I do not have the correct amount of soul required.

When it became disturbingly clear that I was simply NOT pulling it off, the director spent a good 45 minutes of one-on-one time with me. We tried and tried to get my voice to do things that it seemed bound and determined not to do. Here's sixty seconds of that experience. Apparently, I absolutely adore profanity when combined with singing the Lord's praises.

THE SUNDAY SOUND: December 18, Vocal performance and profanity.
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